Vini’s mom often used this line to push the ‘have a baby now’ argument. But Vini and her husband decided to wait at least three years after their wedding before starting a family. Despite their decision, Vini has been under tremendous pressure from both sides of the family for the past year. She can’t seem to convince the elders that she’s not ready to have a baby at this point in her career. Yes, she does want to start a family eventually. She wants to reassure her mom that she won’t be part of the ‘Double Income No Kids’ (DINK) group. But right now, a baby isn’t their priority.
Like Vini and her husband, many couples nowadays are postponing parenthood. More women are having their first babies later in life. While women used to have kids between 20 and 25 years old, it’s now more common for them to have children between 30 and 35. Some women are even becoming mothers in their mid-40s without much fuss.
There are several reasons why couples are choosing to have kids later. For some, it’s a conscious decision, while others feel they don’t have a choice. Here are some reasons for this trend:
Firstly, women are getting married later. They focus more on their careers and often start their first jobs later because they pursue higher education to enhance their skills. This delays the decision to become mothers. Many women feel it’s easier to become a mother than to secure a job.
Secondly, modern couples want to spend more time with each other before having kids. They prioritize their relationship over parenthood initially, which helps them handle the pressures better.
Finances also play a significant role. Today’s parents want to offer their kids a dream life, so they focus on becoming financially stable before starting a family.
Couples are not just waiting because they want to; they’re also aware that advanced medical science makes it possible. Doctors generally advise against waiting until the mid-30s to have kids, but thanks to modern medicine, women have the option. Older couples can opt for procedures like in vitro fertilization or surrogacy if they face difficulties. Women can also freeze their eggs to become mothers when they’re ready. So, what are the benefits of having children later in life?
1. Older Mothers Are More Emotionally Prepared
People mature with age. Older mothers are well-prepared and know what to expect after having kids. They’ve met other mothers and learned a lot over time. These women are emotionally equipped to handle the stresses of parenting and are usually more patient. They understand that quality parenting takes time and are often well-educated about parenting methods, making their children feel emotionally secure.
2. Potential for a Longer Life
Older mothers often worry they won’t live long enough to see their kids grow up, but studies suggest otherwise. Women who have children after 30 might actually live longer, up to 90 years or more. This also applies to those who become mothers after 40.
3. Financial Stability
Couples who wait are typically not concerned about the financial aspects of raising children. They’ve saved enough to provide their kids with a good education and a comfortable lifestyle. They’ve established their careers and understand their professional paths, which benefits their children’s future.
1. Raised by Experienced Moms
Women’s cognitive abilities often improve after menopause. Women who have kids after 35 may benefit from better brain function, less memory loss, and a delayed onset of cognitive decline, due to hormonal changes. These women often invest in education and learning, which can be beneficial for their children.
2. Higher Educational Attainment
Kids of older mothers are generally better exposed and perform better in school. Studies show these children are more likely to pursue higher education, inspired by their well-educated mothers.
3. Stable Home Environment
Older parents tend to create stable environments for their kids. They understand the importance of the right upbringing, which influences kids’ development positively. Children learn by observing their parents handle different situations with maturity and tact, which they carry into their own lives.
Next time someone questions why you don’t have kids yet, you can share these reasons. If you don’t want to explain, you can share this article with them. Ultimately, whether you choose to have children now, later, or not at all is entirely your decision. You don’t have to follow anyone else’s timeline. Celebrate your choices and your womanhood!